Dual Process Model of Grief

What is Dual Process Model of Grief?

Developed by Margaret Stroebe and Henk Schut, this model explains healthy grieving as a dynamic oscillation between two orientations: loss-oriented coping (confronting the pain of the loss) and restoration-oriented coping (engaging with the practical demands of changed life). Unlike stage models that imply linear progression, the dual process model says you naturally swing back and forth — sometimes deeply grieving, sometimes rebuilding — and this oscillation IS the healthy process.

Is there evidence for it?

How do you do Dual Process Model of Grief?

1. 1.Understand the two orientations: Loss-orientation involves grief work — crying, yearning, dwelling on memories, processing the death. Restoration-orientation involves life tasks — dealing with finances, learning new skills the deceased handled, building new identity, engaging in distracting activities. Both are necessary and neither is 'avoiding' grief
2. 2.Notice your oscillation: Track which orientation you spend more time in. Some people get stuck in loss-orientation (constant grief, unable to engage with life) and some get stuck in restoration-orientation (keeping busy to avoid grief). Neither extreme is healthy — the movement between them is what heals
3. 3.Give yourself permission for both: When you're deeply grieving, don't guilt yourself for not 'getting on with life.' When you're having a good day and not thinking about the loss, don't guilt yourself for 'not grieving enough.' The model explicitly includes 'time off' from grief as normal and necessary
4. 4.Deliberately practice the orientation you tend to avoid: If you stay busy and avoid grief feelings, schedule time to sit with memories, look at photos, or write about your loss. If you're stuck in grief and can't function, commit to one restoration-oriented task daily — even small ones like paying a bill or meeting a friend
5. 5.Recognize that the ratio changes over time: Early grief is typically more loss-oriented. Over months and years, the balance gradually shifts toward more restoration-orientation. But loss-oriented moments continue indefinitely — anniversaries, holidays, unexpected triggers — and that's completely normal

How long does it take?

No fixed time — this is a framework for understanding your grief process rather than a timed exercise.

Is it hard to start?

Moderate — the concept is simple but applying it requires self-awareness and self-compassion during an extremely difficult time.

This is one entry from the library Shift matches against. It is general information, not advice about you, and nothing on this page came from anyone's conversation.